The Way Out Of The Middle by Donna Joyce

This piece was created as part of a writing exercise in the Monday morning ReStory class, taught by Erin Mahone at Life in 10 Minutes in Richmond, Virginia. For more information and to register for an upcoming ReStory class visit: www.lifein10minutes.com

The Way Out of the Middle

by Donna Joyce

I'm standing on the edge of the middle and I fucking hate that place. 

I know I don't want to be in the middle.  Nothing happens in the middle.  It's the place to hide with others who are hiding, to be homogeneous and average and I have always been averse to this.

But, standing on the EDGE of the middle is often where I am because of the fear of leaping off the cliff to the net below or across the gap that feels too wide for me to truly reach.  I am just standing there, looking at what might be and challenging it in my mind, justifying not jumping, bowing down to my critic which shows up in so many ways...and then sometimes I am able to feel how painful it is to me to stay in the middle.  I find a way through the numb and white noise. I am able to hear the "YOP!" of my soul and stand at the edge of the middle, like the edge of the high diving board in my childhood, and not just jump but dive into the unknown because I have just enough belief that the net will appear, that the water will not break me, that I will survive the leap and get to the next part of the landscape I am destined for, instead of hiding in plain sight.